HJ Waxing Moon

for what we leave behind us is a part of ourselves; we must die to one life before we can enter another." - Anatole France First there was packing, then moving, and the last 10 days have been a trial as half the time I spent in New York and the other half I spent wishing I had moved some things and not others. The packing process got so crazy that I didn't quite think everything through, because every time someone came over to help I wanted to give them something to do. It resulted in a few things--like the cleaning towels!--getting moved and promptly LOST. I am struggling with the fact that I didn't pack so many of my own belongings. Things got moved that weren't ours and had to be brought back. I have no idea what is in what boxes for half of what I own, so I can't even find a lot of things. It's making me very anxious. My first goal has been to just accept it as a state of being. I'm anxious. Recognize it, acknowledge it, accept it. I'm frustrated. ...

HJ That's me! Heather Jean. I almost can't believe I'm using my real name on the internet, but there it is. I started using my middle name with my first name when I was in 4th grade, and a lot of family members and close friends from school will go back and forth. It just kind of stuck, and now it's almost one word. HeatherJean. Waxing Moon I admit it, this was a screen name I picked in a former life as a candle lady. But after the play on words of selling candles was gone, I couldn't help but want to keep the screen name. It spoke to me somehow, as if it had come out of the Cosmos. It's become a reminder that my life isn't over, it's not even half over. It's just beginning. Life isn't full yet. I'm still trying to fill it up. For someone who struggles with depression, it's a good reminder.